Every few months there is a big uproar in mainstream media about how horrible life is because women cannot have it all. These discussions always amuse me. Typically, the article talks about how hard life is for women who cannot work 16 hours a week at an external job and work 16 hours a day at being a sexy wife and loving mother. The math just doesn't add up if this is how we choose to define having it all.
What if instead of living our lives based on someone else's dreams, we lived our lives based on making our dreams our reality. Let's start with the idea that there are twenty-four hours in each day. I am a WAHM, a work at home mom with a husband, four children, a dog and a cat. Let's take a quick look at my schedule for today:
|IZoe Margate onto the crafty side|
5:30 am-6:00 am Yoga/Exercise
6:00 am Wake up teenie bopper
6:00 am to 7:00 am Work on Blogging Activities
7:00 am to 8:30 am Get three kids up, fed to the school bus
8:30 am to 12:00 pm Work at business
12:00 pm to 1:00 pm Get kids from bus, make lunch, laundry
1:00 pm to 4:20 pm Work at business learning activities with children
4:20 pm to 5:30 pm Get kid from bus, after school snack and start dinner
5:30 pm to 6:30 pm Dinner with family
6:30 pm to 8:00 pm Time with family
8:00 pm to 9:00 pm Get children ready for bed,
9:00 pm to 11:00 pm Adult time with husband
11:00 pm to 12:00 am Work at business and blogging
12:00 am to 5:30 pm Sleep
This is a typical Friday in Janeane's World. In my life, this is having it all. I work, spend time with my children and time with my husband. It is a long day and a day crowded with activity. For me this is how the day has to be because I have responsibilities to others and with others that are time bound and that I cannot change no matter what I may want.
Get out a pen and paper or if you are like me, get out your tablet computer and fill in all your activities for the day like I did above. Be realistic and include everything you need to get done today. Be sure to include the trips to the store, arts and crafts with the kids and picking up the family dry cleaning. Once you have your calendar filled in, sit back and look at it carefully. Are you getting done everything you want done each day. If yes, excellent, send me an email with some ideas on how you do it. If you are not getting done everything you want done, you can do one of the following:
1. take out some of your activities to make room for the ones you don't have time for
2. change your idea of what you need to get done each day
The most important thing you must realize is that it is your life. You decide what you want. You should not be guided by other people, the media or anyone or anything not living in your house. The power to make your life what you want resides in your hands. So instead of crying about what life should be, embrace the life you have and work to make it what you want it to be. Use the calendar to make realistic plans that work in your world and realize that your world is a unique and special place. Have your all, do not try to have someone else's.
No matter what you want to do, no matter you need to do, there are only twenty-four hours in each day. You can have it all, you just need to get real about what the all is you can get done in one day. So the question for you this fantastic Friday is how are you going to define the all you want to have so that your life works for you?